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Author Name: Premiumtinadee 8 Comments
Date Added: July 28, 2010 16:07:37 Average Score: (Needs 2)
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Category: Sonnet Add To Favorites Listen To Poem | Text Only
 
You Make Me Whole


You Make Me Whole

My heart a journey, took into the day,
Above the clouds, succumbed by waters deep,
From mountain's peeks, to valley's frightful way.
In lasting covenants -- were none to keep.
Yet trusting, loving, giving - that was me,
Alone was left to torn asunder be 
And desecrated for eternity,
Laid treasure plundered for debauchery.
But in my darkest hour love came from you,
When mending wings and teaching me to soar,
A gentle whispered vow that rang so true,
An oath to love me now and ever more.
You've taken my discarded, shattered soul
And promised, with your love, to make me whole.



Author's Notes:
This is actually my very first true sonnet. I  had attempted one before but didn't quite get all that a sonnet should encompass.  My heartfelt thanks goes to the Sonnet Master -Tristan, who willing shared his wisdom and knowledge with me, without him it would have just been a poem.

"Dedicated to the one I love"
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Comments:
Comment By: FreeAlfred Berggren on July 31, 2010 02:56:44 PM Report
The last two lines of your beautiful sonnet give it the happy ending I love:
"You've taken my discarded, shattered soul

And promised, with your love, to make me whole."

Comment By: FreeShe Whispers on July 29, 2010 07:42:33 AM Report
What a very pretty Sonnet.....
Yes he is great with Sonnets I admire and respect his poems with so much depth and wisdom.....

Comment By: FreeTristan on July 28, 2010 10:02:09 PM Report
You did a great job. You maintained your integrity of meaning when finding words was difficult.  You contrasted and compared the highs and lows of your life with such truth and poise.  You left the reader with a vision of the inspired love that showed you the way to find completion in your life.  An excellent poem. Well done. Tristan
Comment By: FreeMelody on July 28, 2010 08:01:43 PM Report
This was a wonderful poem of sadness lost, and love found. I love to read the positive side of love, from blue to rainbows, what could be better . Awesome.
Comment By: FreeThe Bag Lady on July 28, 2010 07:38:47 PM Report
Awesome work, Tina....You should be quite proud of your accomplishment with this beautiful piece....Once you have mastered the style/form then the words come from the heart...Lovely read~!
Margaret....a friend in words....

Comment By: FreeLinda Jo on July 28, 2010 06:36:02 PM Report
Tina, what a beautiful sonnet you've written...exceptional word choices, beautiful sentiment...just loved every part of it...and your recording was top notch!  just incredible, my friend...♥ incredible!
Comment By: Freealisha on July 28, 2010 05:51:14 PM Report
wonderful... very sweet and meaningful keep writing.

~Alisha

Comment By: FreeAdri on July 28, 2010 05:06:30 PM Report
He is brilliant, and this sonnet is beautiful. Great write
Adri x




 


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