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Author Name: FreeAtrophiedRibbons 1 Comments
Date Added: June 17, 2010 18:06:40 Average Score: (Needs 2)
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Type: Rhyming
Category: Depression Add To Favorites | Text Only
 
Zero to None
My callous heart...
And my heartless thoughts.
Decaying from the notion that I can't make it through another year
My unerring silence
And my chances rot
I'll never figure this out if I give in to my endless fears.
If I test the limits and divide the lies...
Will my efforts be for naught?
Or do I test the silence and stitch the eyes
And in the darkness I'll be forgot.
So I place faith in this vessel, and faith from above
And I hope that your promise will carry me through
Take a moment for prayer of family and love
And dispel the the burdening fear...of never being with you..

This revolution of poisons, and my fallacies extending range
Its designation is determined to breach my soul
The defiance of voices and this nightmare's steel cage
A little more of the arsenal that depression controls

A walk through the home and all pictures turned down
Just a joke between me and myself
Stay chilled to the bone because no one's around
You should know room to breathe isn't going to help.

So sever the ties, and sever these veins
Because the pain cannot be undone
Surrender my will and render this game
The Cipher has won, zero to none

Author's Notes:
bare fists against concrete
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Comments:
Comment By: FreeTristan on July 9, 2010 12:00:10 AM Report
A very interesting poem.  The range of disturbing descriptions woven within the tapestry of intelligence and emotion is nearly endless.  The intellect is not challenged to understand, but between the realities of sight and sound, the senses are tortured with the emotional pain of grief and loss.  A glimmer of hope shines through the lines: "So I place faith in this vessel, and faith from above And I hope that your promise will carry me through
Take a moment for prayer..."  but other than those thoughts, hope eludes this ode to emptiness and depressed mood.  A brilliant write -- very intelligent and heartfelt -- yet devoid of the longings for life that the loss could possibly bring to the grieving lover.  Excellent writing, images and word-choices.  If you write about your return to life, let me know.  Tristan




 


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