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Author Name: Freesophnibbs9 0 Comments
Date Added: January 21, 2010 02:01:28 Average Score: (Needs 2)
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Type: Unspecified
Category: Depression Add To Favorites | Text Only
 
My Reality
Have you ever felt like you are skimming above the surface of reality? No matter what you do or feel your just barley there. The days start merging together and you don't even know what month it is. Days feel so long sometimes like an abiss just dark and gloomy never ending. The sun never shines here your just in a constant blurry fog that traps you in your thoughts. Lights look like stars in the fog. Very pretty and easy to get lost in. At 2 in the morning the fog is so dense nothing in the world comes through. Staring into a constant blurr of life. Nothing very clear or explainble just what is and how things are. Your feelings don't mean anything in most situations. You reach out to people but, their cold sholders are the only thing you see. Blind stares between two people who were once closer than family. It breaks your soul slowly at first till the pain becomes the norm. Big things that would normally affect you don't seem too important anymore. You feel like you can't get attatched to anyone because, your instincts tell you they will leave eventually and forget about you. Why get to close when the truth is your stories and dreams and hopes don't really matter to anyone but you. Your actually talking to yourself most of the time. Your nights are spent listening to music about the hopes ad dreams you once had. You think about disappearing into the nothing the world really is. This speck in the middle of a black hole. So many questions I used to have about life. Then they were answered and the truth wasen't anything I thought it would be. No one really has it together some are just very good at acting like they are ok. They hide behind their jobs, famlies, projects to keep their sanity. I'm not hiding from it anymore. Having nothing to do makes it flow above the surface where touch dosen't exist anymore. It isen't a sense any longer. Yeah feel as if your skin has a film on it like wax that keeps you from truly feeling anything worth caring about. This is and always will be my Safegaurd. Forever holding me inside
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'My Reality' Copyright © Sophia Nibbelin
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