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Author Name: Freela-la908 1 Comments
Date Added: November 07, 2009 02:11:42 Average Score: (Needs 2)
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Type: Unspecified
Category: Depression Add To Favorites | Text Only
Let Me Go
Sit down next to me
Catch my falling clumps of hair
As fall at your feet
Feel the shivers on the back of you hand
Slump your head down
As you watch my tears drip
Cover your mouth
And conceil the silence of words
You have nothing worth saying to me
Author's Notes:
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'Let Me Go' Copyright © Mahala Rose
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Comment By: FreeSavannah Ollar Jordan on November 7, 2009 09:48:38 AM Report
A good poem - however, I was distracted from it's content by the missing word in the line "As fall at your feet"..needs a word to explain if the hair fell or you fell.  Also one little thing...spelling is so important..conceil should be conceal...I use something called "The Word Book" that is used by secretaries all the time to check spelling of words...I do like your thoughts in your poems, keep writing.  I enjoyed this one.   Savannah



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