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Author Name: FreeAtrophiedRibbons 8 Comments
Date Added: April 16, 2009 18:04:47 Average Score: (Needs 2)
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Type: Rhyming
Category: Abuse Add To Favorites | Text Only
 
One Fell Swoop
She confides in an older man.
Sweet words and warm hands soothe
A lost heart that's been abused

One Small Lie is all it took..

A gentle smile
and a friendly look.
And he took her like a thief

Digging in the hooks.
Author's Notes:

"because you were sweet. and i was lonely."


Everyone I love is broken and stolen.

I would never do you wrong

I would never do you wrong

I would never do you wrong like that.

It's a sad lie.


"He was my world and I was his target"

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Comments:
Comment By: FreeAngel Wings on May 27, 2010 11:52:15 AM Report

You have a way with words..Your gift to us all.


*Angel*


Comment By: PremiumEric Siedzikowski on August 17, 2009 10:56:44 AM Report
good poem
Comment By: FreeA.P. on April 28, 2009 01:39:28 AM Report
i really like this, you've managed to create an entire, powerful scene with a few strong lines...creating emotion, relationships, needs, desires, brokenness, etc.  there is a great flow through this through its subtle rhymes, which makes the powerful ending wrap up perfectly.
nicely done.

Comment By: FreeJami Renae on April 18, 2009 01:33:30 PM Report
I can stop reading this poem over and over.
I just like it..
Alot.



Comment By: FreeJami Renae on April 18, 2009 12:17:22 PM Report
I love reading what you write.
You are so great at it.
This is really good. Just like all of them.


Comment By: FreeShe Whispers on April 17, 2009 09:49:30 PM Report
We all need something to make us feel alive...
 ~ She Whispers

Comment By: FreeJulie on April 16, 2009 07:41:00 PM Report
My Gosh, this was powerfully simple and honest.  It was hard to read because it made me feel so vulnerable, like you had written it just for me.  Great job!  Now get out of my head.

Comment By: FreeEllis Beck on April 16, 2009 07:05:19 PM Report
A really clever poem. Its tone calm yet it content....threatening.

 

I enjoyed it very much

 

E.B





 


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