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Author Name: Freexthinkwhtuwantx 1 Comments
Date Added: December 14, 2008 22:12:05 Average Score: (Needs 2)
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Type: Unspecified
Category: Depression Add To Favorites | Text Only
there should be a caution sign on my mind reading : Do Not Enter.
why do you constantly tell me
i don't deserve this.
i'm not good enough.
why do you repeatedly say
you failed, you lost, you aren't anything
why won't you answer me?
why do you want me to cry?
why do you believe it's okay to feel this way?
why aren't you proud of me?
why aren't you listening?
then i realized,
these questions were echoed in an empty mind
and looking up through tearing eyes i find
i am talking to myself in desperation
because living apparently isn't worth the sensation
and no matter how many times i repeat myself
these words and actions are set to defeat myself
and in this war there are no winners and no praise
overtaken by complimentary cliches
how long must i suffer until i realize
that being perfect offers no prize
and no matter how hard i've tried
i am never satisfied.
and no matter how well i succeed
the littlest mistakes always take the lead
let me watch others become who they want to be
if i can't love myself
it's worth loving someone else other than me
let me watch their faces gleam with pride
if i can't accept myself
it's worth hiding that inside
i want to be happy,
but if succeeding doesn't bring me that,
what's the point in trying?
Author's Notes:
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'there should be a caution sign on my mind reading : Do Not Enter.' Copyright © Brittany Rainess
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Comment By: FreeJessica Ruth Myr on December 20, 2008 09:51:21 PM Report
I really relate to this.  It's a feeling of its very own, a particular flavor of despair, and you've captured it perfectly.

I hope you find an answer to your question.


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