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Author Name: Premiumskipinpin 13 Comments
Date Added: September 05, 2008 18:09:03 Average Score: (Needs 2)
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Type: Unspecified
Category: Humor Add To Favorites | Text Only

Ten-thousand dollars for your right arm,
seven-thousand for the other,
unless you are left-handed on a farm.
In the latter case then it may be more.
Each leg, ten-thousand, at best.
Broken hearts absolutely valueless.

Hands are calculated separately,
up to five-thousand each possibly,
depends what you use them for.
Read the fine print below,
rates subject to change,
if you're a boxer, pitcher or a pro.

A thousand for each digit of the forelimb,
as for the thumbs, two thousand,
provided they're not lost mountain climbing.
Clause 13b section 8 stipulates,
if you are a musician, artist or writer,
don't expect to get any more,
we are not liable for the risks you take.

Twenty-five thousand for each foot,
but both must be on the ground.
Five-hundred per toe, calculated separately,
depends how closely to the foot they were found.
Loss of hearing, sight or touch,
too bad, you are not insured for that much,
you should have thought of that before.

Accidental death is your best investment,
we are all relieved of our commitments,
plus your loved ones can negociate adjustments,
up to one-hundred fourteen-thousand in benefits.

Anyone interested in a body without a soul ?

Author's Notes:
Just wrote it coming back from my insurance agent. Thinking about a couple of friends from a long time ago war. The not so funny part.
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'BODY WORTH' Copyright © Raymond Pinsonneault
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Comment By: FreeRaymond Rat on February 6, 2009 10:41:16 AM Report
I wonder what price an insurance company puts on your willy?
Comment By: TrialPete on October 22, 2008 01:46:07 PM Report
Yeah, The large print giveth and the small print taketh away. Such is life!

Your poem reflects this well.

Comment By: FreeWide Awake on October 6, 2008 05:53:07 PM Report

These insurances just boggle my mind!

But this piece of poetry was exquisitely executed Raymond...cleverly woven!


Comment By: FreeS on September 15, 2008 06:44:04 PM Report
haha this is awesome
"broken hearts absolutely valueless" (genius)

cant believe thats really the price of things

Comment By: FreeGlata on September 7, 2008 11:05:13 PM Report
Raymond, who the heck can afford to die! Ever looked into the death tax?? We, as a whole, are insurance poor and taxed to death...

I can sense a wry sense of humor and a seriousness mixed together here that I thoroughly enjoy.

Great job!



Comment By: FreeAlison Storm Wolf on September 7, 2008 02:16:09 PM Report
A lot of rye observations here...I could think of many ways people get compensation in this country...but it would start an argument of monumental proportions...Yes, the devil looks after his own and the rest of us just hope for the best.
An Edinburgh traffic warden is better paid than a young soldier...the world has gone mad.

Ali x

Comment By: FreeCathy on September 7, 2008 10:31:09 AM Report
I really enjoyed this amazing write cute yet sad to think we have come to this..put a price one your lives so sad ...  Excellent in every word love it

Comment By: FreeFLETCHER on September 7, 2008 12:31:29 AM Report

Excellent Write Raymond!


Comment By: Freenoah count on September 6, 2008 10:06:01 PM Report
This piece coalesced with, "a long time ago war.  The not so funny part.".
Comment By: FreeAngel on September 6, 2008 11:14:52 AM Report

All about profit. Where has the word caring gone cannot see that in the small print? Even though its small try to make sense of what it says as they word it so they can twist it. Not just clever but heartless as well...




Comment By: FreeGraham Jones on September 6, 2008 04:41:47 AM Report
We all have pet hates and this is one of mine, there to protect you and screw you over all in one breath, have you ever heard the sound of one hand clapping, well thats an insurance contract for you, great writing my friend.
Comment By: FreeBarbara Demasson on September 6, 2008 04:26:36 AM Report
"Broken hearts absolutely valueless."...what a kick in the behind this is eh (maybe better defined as getting screwed, not kicked) but so true I could cry!! The fine print really isn't so fine for the is written so small it is hardly able to be read...and for good reason. Isn't life/death all about making a profit at any cost? *sarcasm* It sure seems that way when it comes to insurance agents and those stupid agreements that leave us feeling totally dismembered even before it happens. This is a great post Raymond and so true, we really are worth more dead than alive without limbs. *yikes that is so harsh* That last line is awesome...I love the sarcasm. Fine work!! =))



Comment By: FreeShe Whispers on September 5, 2008 07:23:48 PM Report
Well I just read this ...Wanted Poster
 "In Texas  we have Bounty Hunters "
 After reading this ..Not sure if your worth enough a live or dead!! But now a body without a soul..
that is another matter
 Either way I have a sense of humor myself...
 Just try and see if you can stay alive.
 Brilliant poem that catches the Bounty  Hunter eyes...Smilesss
 ~ She Whispers


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