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Author Name: Freerainbowchaser 5 Comments
Date Added: April 13, 2008 21:04:25 Average Score: (Needs 2)
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Type: Unspecified
Category: Grieving & Loss Add To Favorites Listen To Poem | Text Only
 
Think to Breathe
Blushing citrus skies
Kiss the shore, a new dawning.
Whispering winds upon the waves
Call out his name, in mourning.
I have to think to breathe...
 
Blushing citrus skies
Kiss the shore at day's break.
A vast blue expanse
Matches eyes that danced.
Eyes, that pierced the soul
That begged, borrowed, stole
My breath away...
 
Blushing citrus skies
Kiss the shore, Good Morning.
Memories crash at my feet
And scatter across the sand.
I'll bury myself deep, forlorning.
Remembering us, at our best
Until I catch my breath.
Author's Notes:

 

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Comments:
Comment By: PremiumMary Lou Allen on November 4, 2008 03:42:14 PM Report
I don't think I can say exactly how much I love this work. Just know that I love it. Before I came online today thoughts very similar to yours were tumbling around in my brain but hadn't yet settled into something I could write, and now I see that you've already written it. Well done. ML 
Comment By: FreeJose Noriega on April 14, 2008 01:36:42 PM Report
this is a good poem the ending is what i felt the most
Comment By: PremiumJoe McNinney on April 14, 2008 06:24:05 AM Report
I think Adri below says it best. Nicely done, Joe
Comment By: FreeAdri on April 14, 2008 03:04:45 AM Report
Poetry is poetry, as long as it has soul and feel, it can be only one sentence. 
This is perfect, just as is.  Talk about starting out with a bang! 
If this is the first, I can not wait to see the rest. 

Adri x

Comment By: FreeVince on April 14, 2008 12:41:31 AM Report
i really don't have anything to offer other than i read it, i felt it, and it left me speechless (at least for the last few minutes).

Detailed critique. Hmm. i still have nothing, for this poem, in my opinion, should not be touched again, it is perfect.

Thanks for sharing.

-vince





 


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