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Author Name: TrialAnn 6 Comments
Date Added: June 18, 2006 18:06:12 Average Score: (Needs 2)
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Category: Philosophy Add To Favorites | Text Only
 
Gray and Light
One step and another,
I touch the cracked earth
with sandals that are
the second skin of summer
and the sun bleaches
my dark hair to auburn
in places that must be
youth trying to persist.

Iím not offended
as age rattles its
scabard at my face
little lines grin
and strands of gray glint
because I know a secret;
laughter is ageless
and twinkling eyes
transcend timeís march.

Iíve outlived the fortune teller
and slipped by the reaper;
I find my redemption
somehow with a lightened heart
and a spring in the step
catching priceless moments,
storing them up,
never letting time see me flinch.


Author's Notes:

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Comments:
Comment By: FreeFirestone Feinberg on October 8, 2011 02:32:46 PM Report

I must have hit the wrong button -- so it looks like i have a comment where i didn't put one.  Anyhow, you are an amazing poet.  So much talent!  Such a gift for words! Whatever you do, don't give up writing.  You have a great gift -- and though given to you -- it is meant for you to give back to the world -- yes, starting with us.  A great poem.  What else can I say?




--FlintHunter

Comment By: FreeFirestone Feinberg on October 8, 2011 02:29:01 PM Report


Comment By: FreeCeeCee on June 19, 2006 06:13:40 PM Report
Ann,

 

I just had to come back to this poem and mention some of the subtle refinements you offer within this poem (besides its wonderful message). For instance, "sandals that are the second skin of summer"  offers consonance, allteration and metaphor in one phrase.  Then you carry over the "s" into the next line of "sun bleaches". 

 

In the second stanza the first line has the short "o" sound as an assonance as well as a combination of "n" and "m"s within it.  Then the phrase "little lines grin" is another alliteration of "l" that brings in the "n" sound again through consonance.  The "g" continues into the next line with another alliteration of "gray, glint".  The last lines in this stanza bring about a "t" alliteration and flavors in the "m"s again.

 

Lastly your thought of "never letting time see me flinch" was brilliant.  Your writer's voice flowed throughout this piece like a lullabye.  You have a gift of hearing the music of words. 

 

This poem was incredible and needs to be read by many.  Again, excellent, artistic work, Ann.

 

Cari

 

 

 

 

 

In the next

Comment By: FreeWide Awake on June 19, 2006 10:43:56 AM Report
An interesting thing...living...aging...something that must be accepted like little other isn't it? :)

I have moments like these at times...no quite sure what to make of them, if you cannot tell by my comment here :)

 

Personally, on the whole...I think Im happier with myself now, than I was way back when...I know who I am, and find that preferable to the "empty" beauty of youth...shrugs...

Lovely poetry Ann.

Best wishes,
Pamela 

Comment By: FreeCeeCee on June 18, 2006 10:09:03 PM Report
Ann...such excellence of writing you share with us.  Thank you.

 

CeeCee

Comment By: PremiumMary Lou Allen on June 18, 2006 07:58:28 PM Report
Bravo!  Good for you, Ann.  This is plumb elegant.  ML 




 


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