Santa is trying something different this year
He has fired all of his elves,
He hired a Ninja squirrel
Santa thinks he'll do rather well.
Santa got tired of the shenanigans
His elves pulled every year,
So, he fired every one of them
In his heart, he held them so dear.
There are a lot of things
For the Ninja squirrel to do,
He heard the stories that Santa had told him
And the crap the elves put him through.
The Ninja squirrel ran around
Chopped wood in half,
Used his samurai sword
And made a tiny giraffe.
Santa said he would have to make more
For the children of the world,
The elves argued with Santa in the background
"Why did you hire that Ninja squirrel?"
The ninja squirrel overheard them
And ran toward them yelling,
Punched a few of them in the face
Their eyes started swelling.
He flipped through the air
And headed back to his work,
One of the elves stood up
"I'd like to see you try that again, you hairy little jerk!"
The Ninja squirrel laughed
He held a glare in his eyes,
He knew he would have to deal with this
Which wasn't a surprise.
He kicked and he screamed
His arms flailed in the air,
He kicked one elf in the head
Santa stood and laughed in the corner there.
Santa was laughing so hard
He almost wet himself,
He knew he had the right idea
When he fired all his elves.
Santa was proud of the Ninja squirrel
He patted him on the head,
Left the Ninja squirrel and elves to fight
Then he went to bed.